Have you ever wondered about your identity? I did, and I can see it like that in my mind:
It’s the basic common nature we all share. I always clearly see how similar we are although we seem different. Motherhood, fatherhood, friendship, homesickness, love.. are some aspects of this humanity.
Then I cannot neglect the effect of my sex in drawing my identity, but not in an extreme feminist point of view. I can just say that I appreciate females so much for several reasons:
– A female can do most male roles, while he can’t do hers.
– In every positive gathering: lectures, voluntary work,… you can see as much females as you wish but as less males unfortunately.
– When females believe in something, they give generously, love passionately.. so much power!
As for males, I cannot say anything cuz a male is my dad, my brother, my teacher, my husband, my son, my colleague… So no hard feelings at all dear colleagues in this world 🙂
Ironically I’m writing in English about my Arabic roots! But this has nothing to do with my real identity. I did have a general problem in expressing myself, and when the writing skill evolved, it sparked in English first, but the Arabic is yet to come Insha’Allah.
Egypt.. my beloved:
It’s in the heart as the diagram shows.
I remember every time I come back to Egypt from abroad, and how my heart beats or my tears fall with the first sight of the Egyptian land, with the first breath of the Egyptian air – yes no matter how much polluted it is.
In the Arab world, I always felt so much appreciated – most of the time – for being Egyptian. In Lebanon, people would listen to me so much respectfully. In Saudi Arabia, vendors would smile involuntary before I would ask about the price of anything, not making fun but expecting fun. In Europe, I’d see a different look: a mix of astonishment & cautiousness followed by respect & admiration, but this has to do with the other circles as well: a smiling veiled Muslim, Egyptian & Arabic female!
I’ve always asked myself what is it that I love so much in Egypt, is it the land? Ok what about the land after the so-called borders? May be I’ll write someday about the illusion of borders because they are meaningless to me.
Is it the people? Is it the culture? Is it the history?
Well I think I love Egypt for all of that. I dream of seeing Egypt a stronger country very soon Insha’Allah cuz it deserves the best. And I work for that as much as I can.
I delayed talking about my religion only cuz it’s the strongest root. Yes the strongest for many reasons:
1- The first 4 circles, I didn’t choose them yet I thank Allah for creating me an Arabic Egyptian female. And although I was born as a Muslim, yet I’m old enough to say that I’ve thought sincerely & searched seriously & I do choose Islam (another article needed).
2- The religion is a very long term relationship. It’s about life & after-life. And the after-life will be eternal. And Allah will account us with no discrimination based on sex, ethnicity or nationality. So I cannot depend on anything for a better after-life rather than Allah’s mercy, a pure heart and good deeds.
3- People with the same belief have a very special bond regardless of ethnicities or nationalities.
4- There is no conflict between my strong attachment to my religion & my love to my country or my ethnic group or sex.
5- Belonging to Allah, gives me the strongest power & the truest serenity.
Those were my main 5 circles that I work seriously to make each of them proud of me. I can look at them:
From outside to inside:
If I’m a good human being making good use of my mind (which distinguish me from animals), I will certainly search for the Creator of this universe. I will search for the message He sent to us. I found it is Islam.
Qur’an, our Holy Book is in Arabic. The center of the Arab world is my beloved Egypt.
From inside to outside:
If Egypt’s general status is better, the Arab world would be better, thus the Muslims around the world would be better and finally the world would be a better place for all of us.
I can add as much circles as you wish, circles of interests & ideas. But here I chose those five as the main dimensions for me.
One last important point:
Being confident & proud of what I belong to doesn’t mean disrespect for other circles other people belong to.
After all, there are things out of our choice, and the things that we can choose, Allah has given us minds to think & choose. So all my respect to anyone who seriously think with his/her mind & sincerely listen to his/her heart.